By: Hollis G.
There’s always an excuse, You’re:
-waiting until you feel better,
-waiting until you are sure,
-waiting for a sign
-waiting for your kids to get a little older
-waiting for more money
The truth is You ARE
. . . wasting TIME!
In any given moment, we have an infinite number of choices about what to do. Our choices either serve our life purpose or they do not. If you make enough choices that do not serve your purpose, you are living an unfulfilled, purposeless life. You are doing the world and YOURSELF a disservice! The time is NOW!
You may ask but what exactly is my purpose?
Your life purpose is to be who you are AUTHENTICALLY – the real true self under all of the facades, hurts, expectations, and social conditioning. You must push yourself to live that AUTHENTICITY in every moment of every day. If you aren’t in touch with who that person is, then it is nearly impossible to live a purposeful life.
Sometimes to get in touch with your real true self, you have to ask yourself, “Who do I want to be?” You have to define the characteristics, beliefs, actions, and lifestyle of your ideal self. Most of us aren’t in touch with that person. We aren’t proactive about finding out who we are. Instead, we start to seek something outside of ourselves to give us direction and purpose. SPOILER ALERT: Your purpose arises naturally from authentic living.
The art of self-realization
How exactly do you find that “real self”? How do you become authentic and sure about who you are so that you can live out your life purpose? Being here in my own journey to finding my purpose, by myself on this beautiful island has forced me to answer this exact question. And here’s the thing! There is a process to this!
Here are the four steps I went through that helped me realize my purpose. Sharing this with you can help you skip over a few uncomfortable moments like I experienced (talking to soda cans, randomly crying…this may or may NOT have happened to me!). Skipping some of the uncomfortableness here are 4 steps to help you realize your purpose NOW:
- Listen; Intuition is always right
- Learn; your past experiences good AND bad have messages for us
- Manage; time is precious use it wisely
- Ask. What is most important to me?
Without clear direction, your life and life choices can be entirely at the mercy of circumstances and other people who may mean well but only make it worse. You MUST silence the “noise” around you, take some time to dig deep and ask yourself “What is most important to me?” Now this only works if you are 200% honest with yourself with no judgment. I find asking yourself this question a few times helps to get to the bottom of it. The first few times you answer the question will be surface answers that you’ve been “conditioned” to say.
Asking this simple question and being intentional about answering it will focus you on what you deeply want, who you want to be, and how you get there.
You can try this right now by answering these questions for yourself. Write down the answers so you don’t forget.
- What kind of person do you want to be? Describe the top 10 most important characteristics. (ie: creative, honest, loving, healthy, adventurous, etc.).
- Whose life do you admire and want to emulate? What is it about their life that inspires you?
- What activities make you feel most fulfilled and happy? (look at your work activities and everyday life ones)
- If you could divide your time exactly the way you wanted between work, family, hobbies, leisure, and life maintenance activities, how would you divide your time?
- How are you dividing your time now? How close is it to the ideal you described above?
- Are you passionate about your work? If not, what would you rather be doing?
- Are you happy in your relationships? If not, how are you contributing to the difficulty and what could you do to change it?
- Are there any ways you are living outside of your integrity? If so, what could you do to restore your integrity?
- Do you have needs or desires that you are suppressing or putting on the back burner? What are they?
- Are you spending a lot of time doing things that feel empty and meaningless?
- Do you have emotions that get in the way of taking action toward being true to yourself? Why do you have these feeling?
- If you could re-design your life from scratch, what would be the first thing you would change?
- What is the most obvious place in your life where you are living outside of your authentic, ideal self?
Once you have answered these questions, you have an outline for who you want to be. Becoming that person is your life purpose. All other meaning and purpose in life arises from being a fully functioning, self-realized, authentic human being.
It is the moment by moment “becoming” that is your life purpose — not the arrival at some final destination. And when you define your authentic self, you have a blueprint against which to measure all of your actions and choices.
But even within that blueprint, there are choices and options. What should you do first? What actions will result in positive change? What if I make the wrong choice or decision?
That’s where intuition comes in.
- Listening to your intuition
Over time we have become reactionary vs. creative. Have you ever heard the phrase “You are the creator of your own destiny”? There is so much truth in that statement! But in order to really embody that you first have to shed that old skin of reaction. The phone rings and we answer it. The text comes in and we look at it. Someone interrupts and we stop to talk. The TV is on and we are distracted. This is STILL a lesson I am learning! In fact it took me twice the time to even write this blog because REACTION/DISTRACTION MUCH?!?
So much of life is not by our own design but results from something arriving in front of us. We think oh our package has arrived I MUST open it NOW! But honestly, YOU DON’T HAVE TO DO IT RIGHT NOW?!? The world will not come to an end if you don’t respond NOW. You don’t have to give away your time, your energy, or your true self. The most beautiful gift you can give yourself is to step back from the reacting mode and allow yourself time for self-creation.
Self-creation requires . . .
- quiet, uninterrupted time;
- more questioning;
- deep listening to your own innate wisdom;
- a leap of faith.
In those moments of quiet introspection, hopefully at the beginning of each day, ask yourself these questions and listen intently for the answers from within yourself:
-What are the three most important things I need to do today? (Start with three)
-Are these things in alignment with my purpose (of becoming who I am authentically)?
-If so, what are the actions I need to take right now and for the rest of the day to move forward with these three things?
-If not, is this really a necessary task for the day? How can I eliminate or diminish spending time on this now or in the future?
If several things seem important or if you aren’t sure what to do, then take that leap of faith. Do something that you think might move you toward your authentic self. Even if you are wrong, the experience will provide you information for making choices in the future.
- Learning from past experiences
When we make mistakes and learn to turn those mistakes into wisdom it’s like creating a mental database for the future! When we’re worried that we are ill-equipped for a task, a moment, an experience that is the perfect time to check your database for resources to help you make decisions in the moment. TRUST yourself! No one knows what’s better for you than YOU!
Our intuition draws from these past experiences, allowing the “right” decision to rise to the surface. TRUST!
Mistakes and failures are stepping-stones on the path of becoming a fully realized person. They are a necessary part of personal evolution and embracing your life purpose.
- Managing your time
The final KEY STEP in living your life purpose right now is practical but necessary. There are 24 hours in a day and only about 17 waking hours. Subtract the time to eat, shower, and handle the necessary tasks of living. What you have remaining is what you have to work with in living purposefully. You will have many, many more purpose-driven activities than you will have hours in a day. You have to prioritize — or simply choose. You will need to balance your time between the various important aspects of your life.
The idea is not to cram as much as you can in a moment or day or lifetime. The idea is to make every moment count! When you fill every moment with purpose, you are living a life of purpose.
Your life purpose isn’t something you attain at the end of your life. It is something you live in the here and now by constantly creating your life in response to your evolving awareness of who you really are.
SO Let’s begin! Start living your in your purpose NOW! And if things are still a little unclear for you well guess what! I’m here to help!! Let’s talk about it!
It’s time to be living purposefully!
~”The purpose of an empowerment coach is to help clear you out of what no longer serves you and birth your ideas into dreams come true! Is coaching for you? Book a discovery call TODAY!”